#ShakespeareWeek on Goodreads

It's #ShakespeareWeek on Goodreads and they're doing all sorts of bard-related fun stuff! Like having people write deleted scenes from Billy's work! Naturally, I couldn't resist at taking a crack at it myself. Please find below for your amusement, the alternate ending to Romeo & Juliet . . .

Romeo & Juliet - Alternate/Original Ending (taken from the 1st draft)

Prince: We settle a dark peace this morning. The sun is too sad to show itself. Let’s go, to talk about these sad things some more. Some will be pardoned, and some will be punished. There was never a story more full of pain than the story of Romeo and Ju--

Coroner: Actually, they're not quite dead yet, sire.

Prince: What do you mean 'they're not dead yet'?

Coroner: Looks like Juliet nicked a couple of arteries but we managed to stop the bleeding and she'll be fine. We were able to counteract the poison in Romeo's system with a simple transfusion. 

Prince: Are you sure?

Coroner: Oh yes, quite sure. Modern medicine at its best, sire. 

Prince: Well, alright then. <to the crowd> it appears they're going to be fine. So, new agenda: We'll be hanging Romeo tomorrow for the murders of Paris and Mr. Tibbs (*Tybalt's original character name -  1st draft). Juliet will be imprisoned for drug trafficking along with her dealer, Friar Laurence.

Friar Laurence (shocked): Me, sire?! But I'm just a simple Friar.

Prince: You're not fooling anyone! You're obviously a drug dealer. How else can you explain that dodgy-looking haircut?

Friar Laurence: I'm a Friar! It's the style.

Prince: Guards! Arrest him!

<crowd applauds enthusiastically>

Prince: So, once again, we settle a dark peace this morning. The sun is still too sad to show itself. Bloody miserable weather. Let’s go, to talk about these sad things some more. Some will be pardoned, pretty much no one actually, and some will be punished, as I just stated. There was never a story more full of pain than the story of Romeo and Juliet. And don't forget about the obligatory pot-luck lunch after the hanging tomorrow. And don't just bring potato chips, put some effort into it! I want to see some variety!

THE END